I was reminded by my counselor today about the importance of regulating the nervous system. As this is one of the foundational blocks of psychosomatic work, it rose to my attention quite strongly in me today. This can look like sitting and breathing and bringing attention to the body. Bringing my awareness down into the body and feeling it where it's at. I have been working on observing the sympathetic responses to stress, when I get into fight, flight, freeze and fawn mode and learning how to become more attuned with regulating my reactions to triggers. We all have our own unique way of responding to stress. There is only so much the mind can do and figuring it out only goes so far. The work involves regulating our bodies in response to stress and in becoming more observant to how we react from our traumas and triggers. Making a relationship to our bodies wisdom rather than letting the mind try and attempt to control everything.
We all have different definitions of what safety means for us. And it seems that control to enact safety has been a very played-out method. I have mistaken control for safety and still do in some ways. It manifests in my relationships to how I interact with the world around me. I think the more useful approach I am realizing in mind and rooting in body is the need to take full responsibility for my thoughts and actions, when I get triggered, when I project, when I deflect, when I bypass. Expanding the room within to include all the parts of myself, the victim, the predator, the scared child, the rebel, the aloof...and acknowledge my humanness with sincerity.
To self-soothe and self-regulate.
To sharpen senses and intuition.
The challenge is when we aren't used to doing this for ourselves. When it becomes consistent, it becomes devotion, to make ritual of tapping into the inner ravine as a resource of replenishment.
To connect to who we are, extensions of nature.
To be honest about what we need and move in the direction of fulfilling them. It can be simple like a walk in the woods to having a conversation. We need to co-regulate and connect with each other and ask for help, sometimes. When I talk to others that I trust who can be open to listening to what I have to say and feel underneath what I am saying, it is validating. It is a very caring and nourishing sensation for our bodies to experience. It eases the anxiety and gives the medicine of connection and belonging.
To sit with the sensations.
To transmute them through breath, through song and music.
To shake off the static, so to speak, and reset the nervous system.
To stay in the body and learn to not dissociate because things happening in life creates discomfort.
When I feel into discomfort, I want to shimmy out of my skin! I am curious about feeling the discomfort and tuning this energy in fueling my channel of creativity. To go deeper, beyond the emotion, beyond the thought, and settle in.
The arts is a home for chaos. The arts can bring us into activating our imagination and ground us into our bodies. The arts can be a channel to voice our feelings and create a portal to feel our way through the discomfort. It's a form of alchemy. I used some of the fear and anger I was feeling this morning into singing and playing my guitar. I am fueled by this energy and I can either help myself or hurt myself. I am feeling into the wild nature to support the passionate lioness within me to purr, to roar, to run. To feed, to linger, to rest. I need to take care of her.
Music and writing are a couple of ways that stir the cauldron of fiery love in my heart. Connecting with the people that I consider my tribe is also a vital part of moving through this world. Taking space to let myself be and play is a necessity. To give thanks to what my ancestors and family have gifted me and to give thanks to attempting to live more freely in my whole being. To live and to learn, to observe and discern, to stumble and fall and pick myself up. To soften and gaze into my lovers eyes. To remember the heart. To beat the medicine drum and honor my feelings. To honor the ways I have protected myself and to allow myself to feel into my vulnerabilities. To give thanks to my precious, strong body and to my flexible, powerful mind. To respect life and death. To attune to the song that forms the foundation of the stage of here and now.
To dream and remember.
To wonder and saunter.
To swim in the elements that make up our existence.
Earth. Fire. Water. Air.
Below we go, we make descent,
Into the caves within the depths,
No words shared within this breadth.
Climbing down, down, into the dark,
Let be the spark that guides our heart.
Far below where roots are sowed,
Where waters replenish our thirsty tongues.
- T. Gainor
